


childishly fresh eyes

by Skullsnsunflowers



Category: Friday Night Funkin' (Video Game), Pico's School (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Dementia, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Everywhere At The End of Time - The Caretaker, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Illnesses, Major Illness, Memory Loss, Multi, actual illness is not specified, but it could be, or - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-24 19:49:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30077451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skullsnsunflowers/pseuds/Skullsnsunflowers
Summary: //Inspired by the album 'Everywhere at the end of Time' by The Caretaker and the FNF mod themed after it////read A/N for triggers and a disclaimer//--------------''Staring into the void of his bedroom mirror, he could hardly recognize himself.Eyes that were once childishly fresh, weighed down with fear and despair, face all dark circles and sickly pale skin.But even so, he seemed to be flickering away, his physical form withering.''
Relationships: Boyfriend (Friday Night Funkin') & Pico (Pico's School), Boyfriend (Friday Night Funkin')/Pico (Pico's School), Boyfriend/Girlfriend (Friday Fight Funkin')/Pico (Pico's School), Boyfriend/Girlfriend (Friday Night Funkin'), either platonic or romantic- interpret it either way
Comments: 7
Kudos: 89





	childishly fresh eyes

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger Warnings: implied major illness, mild unintentional self harm towards the end, disassociation/depersonalization. Pls dont read if you are sensitive towards these topics  
> \--Disclaimer--  
> Obviously, Everywhere at the end of time has themes of dementia and memory loss. However, even after researching the symptoms I wouldnt feel comfortable outright stating and diagnosing it in this fic. I am in no way a doctor or medical professional(!!) but I have researched and read accounts of patients. So, while this includes symptoms of Dementia (Blanks in memory, apathy, unstable sleeping patterns, depersonalization) it can also be read as depression/trauma processing

Slowly, awareness flickered.

( _If you could call it that_ )

Half- processed memories swelled back, and he swallowed back the nausea that came with the blank in his memory.

He was getting worse; he could feel it in static crowding in his mind

In the dishes piling up on his desk, forgotten

In Pico’s eyes that crinkled with sadness everytime he would visit, these days.

The memories _burned_

_(and he burned with it)_

Lethargically, he swung his legs over the bed and stumbled across, just as light flickered into the room.

His phone rung, and for a terrifying moment he couldn’t place the name.

‘‘Hello?’’ he rasped, voice crackling with unused

‘‘Keith.’’ The voice on the other side overflowed with concern. He was snapped back into reality.

_~~G irl fri end?~~ _

‘‘How are you feeling?’’ She whispered, as if she was holding something fragile, afraid to shatter it.

Keith forced a grin, trying to force false cheer through his voice

‘‘I’m great! Never- never been better!’’

‘‘Mm’’ She sounded disbelieving, but he couldn’t blame her.

Staring into the void of his bedroom mirror, he could hardly recognize himself.

Eyes that were once childishly fresh, weighed down with fear and despair, face all dark circles and sickly pale skin.

But even so, he seemed to be flickering away, his physical form withering.

It didn’t seem like him

Then again, what made up ‘him’, exactly? _~~Maybe he’d known the answer, once.~~_

(w̸̡͇̮̄͝ a̵̳̞̬̽͊̀͘s̷̿̿̈ h̷̢̡̺̗̠̹̏͆͝e̶͛̊

̸̬͙̞͖͎̑͊

̷̦̻̉̒̚͝r̸̈́̒ o̸̮̦͈̽̔̽̅̾tṱ̷̞̑̇̓̚ī̴̦̯̠̖̐̂̈́̾ n̶̩͐̕g?̷̬̃̆͛̎?)

He shook the thought away, but it still lingered in the back of his mind.

‘‘-th? Did you get that?’’

Oh. He’d drifted away again.

‘‘Yeah’’ he mumbled, not waiting for a response and instead setting down his phone on the bed, apathetic as it tumbled to the floor.

He gazed at the ceiling, before finding with a numb awareness that he was hungry.

How long had it been since hed last eaten? He couldn’t place the exact memory, but he dimly remembered as the food clogged in his throat, the almost betrayed expression of Pico, hands slamming onto a table and a desperate, angry plea.

Maybe there was a time when he could’ve cupped the other’s hands in his face and reassured him, cried with him.

But his hands were now numb, and he acted like an observer, eyes dim and fuzzed with confusion when someone broke down in front of him-

-The door bell was ringing.

( _How long had it been_ -)

He stumbled to open it with unsteady steps, and found himself enveloped in a familiar, warm embrace.

A smile tugged at his mouth.

It felt like returning home.

‘‘Wanted to check up on you’’ Murmured _~~someone~~_ Pico(?)

Faintly, he recognized the smell of warmth and firecrackers.

They pulled away, and Pico gave his familiar snarky grin, although there was an undertone of sadness.

‘‘How have you been holding up?’’ he said, fingers still tangled in Boyfriend’s blue curls

Keith fumbled with the hem of his sweater.

'‘Fine. Or, at least, as fine as I can be with everything going on.’’

Pico nodded, eyes flickering to the desolate bedroom, and widening in shock.

‘‘Jeez, this place looks like it got run over’’

Keith just shrugged, not finding the energy nor care to be embarrassed.

Pico looked unnerved at the lack of response, but continued

‘‘Lucky I got here when I did, huh? How about we go outside for a bit? Get some fresh air, away from all...this?’’ He suggested, gesturing at the clutter that flooded most of the house.

The words stuck in Keith’s throat, but the thought of leaving felt terrifying. He wanted to stay in his familiar chaos.

At the very least, it was recognizable.

‘‘No-’’ he forced out

‘‘I’d like to- stay here, if that’s ok.’’

He couldn’t meet Pico’s eyes, but the other still gathered him into his arms.

‘‘Of course it is.’’

He couldn’t place how long they’d stayed like that, but sometime in the haze Girlfriend had arrived, lingering at their side and tidying up a stack of plates or dusting a curtain occasionally.

Despite the tiredness in his bones, Boyfriend felt content.

Suddenly, a blaring note struck the air, the beginning of a song.

Girlfriend startled, head snapping up.

Keith rubbed his eyes, half asleep

‘‘Pico- what?’’

‘‘You two look so down, come on, dance with me!’’ Pico crowed, yanking his partners by the hand.

Girfriend gave a giggling shriek, but joined in all the same.

They linked hands, dancing clumsily to the blare of the trumpet.

The melody was slow but lively, resembling an 80’s ballroom. Pico pulled his partners in, softly clasping their hands together in a sort-of slow dance.

‘What’s this song called?’’ whispered Keith

Pico nudged his forehead against the other’s in affection

‘‘My heart will stop in joy’’

Keith hummed, listening closer.

The music filled with flickers of static.

Despite the fading quality, it was still mostly joyful

‘‘I think I could lose myself in it’’ Boyfriend sighed happily.

-Before he knew it, he drifted into unsteady dreams.

His throat was clogged with unspoken words

_~~W he~~ _

_~~re~~_?

A stream of faint memories flowed, and he was sucked into its tides

_He wȁ̶̄_ _͝_ _̖̀̊̋_ _͖͉_ _s̸̥̈́̆_ _͕_

_d̷̛̙r̶̈́_ _͎_ _o̶̕_ _͉_ _w̷_ _͗_ _̬n̷̡̕ḯ̴̹n̵̫̅g̵_ _̓_ _̼_

_(?)_

With a gasp and a headache hammering into him, he awoke

To two pairs of trembling arms

_Sa ~~fe?~~_

_Yes, they were Home._

‘‘You’re ok. You’re ok.’’ Girlfriend’s voice shook, but had a fierce reassurance to it.

Keith nodded in a daze, feeling strong but gentle hands push away his own painful grip.

He squinted to see trails of ruby trickle down his arm, pain starting to sting in the tiny rivulets he’d made with his nails.

The pain was something he could focus on, an escape from the overwhelming emotions swirling in his head. He shuddered at the sight and curled up further under the sheets.

Finally, he met his partner’s eyes, two pairs of watchful gazes.

‘‘Sorry...’’

‘‘For what? Don’t apologize, dumbass.’’ Pico rolled his eyes but pulled the other closer.

Keith almost said something to protest, but feeling the comfort of the two people he trusted with his entire heart, he couldn’t bring himself to push them away.

Girlfriend gave a gentle but firm tug at his head, and he sighed fondly.

‘‘Can you two atleast have the decency to not screw up my hair?’’

'‘Nope!’’ chorused two voices.

Keith resigned himself to the incessant clinginess and finally, voluntarily let himself drift.

(( _They would be there to save him if he drowned.))_

**Author's Note:**

> o shit lads its another angsty one. i might write another chapter of the aftermath of this one, lmk if u want it!! remember to stay safe and hydrate 💕  
> song referenced: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSbj99SCBds - my heart will stop in joy  
> btw the jarring nature+sudden scene changes were intentionaly written, but let me know if its too messy and i need to edit it.
> 
> as usual, commenting puts the funkin' in fnf!!


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